I have been in a bad mood for a while. I have not gotten to training yet... My on the job training has been delayed a week due to a store that apparently decided not to host an awesome promotion, and there therefore being no on the job to train in.
Also, my ex who I've been badgering to come and hang out and help me practice my script, by reading along while I say it without looking and letting me know if I miss anything, has yet again decided he had to bail because his damaged back is giving him problems and he doesn't want to spend much time out and about as a result. This is profoundly frustrating. At this point, the most useful form of practice would really need the participation of someone else.
I've been generally angry for quite a few days, and often can't pin down a particular reason why. Just little things: There aren't enough groceries, I'm impatient to get to on-the-job training and the company doesn't seem to ever follow through with anything, even sending me a phone number they said they'd send me... Maybe I'm PMSing? Puppy's having a meltdown and saying that while he loves me and is satisfied with me, he's pining for a feeling of choice and control over his relationships, the feeling that he has more options than this crazy girl who dropped out of the internet and came on to him or being alone. And given that he's Aspie and has a very hard time knowing how the hell to maneuver social stuff, he feels entirely stuck as to how to accomplish that sense of choice and control over his life.
I find it damn near impossible to take this gracefully in my recent state of mind.
Grr. Rargle. Ruff ruff ruff. I am a raging bloody tempest, sulking over here in a corner. I am a berserker queen who has been denied cake. Life sucks and I want a happy. Why I can no has!?
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